PhilGood

Squirm if you need to, it happened. Waking up with a brain shattering fever brought new meaning to the witches hour today. I found myself delusional and curled up in a foetal position at 3 AM with a bizarre fiesta in my stomach.

With temperatures exceeding human capacity, my mind began to play tricks on me. I started reenacting my dreams, bordering between sleep and insanity. One peculiar hallucination involved me desperately trying to send emails whilst pulling my pants down…now I knew something was wrong, terribly wrong. I stumbled back and forth from my bed to the bathroom enough to know I needed some help. And so I pushed through the rest of the morning, tossing and turning, deliriously awake but not, waiting for the world to wake up.

I managed to make it to daylight and get to  a doctor who prescribed antibiotics, probiotics, nausea medication, cramp medication, and blissfully powerful pain killers. Needless to say, the combination of drugs put me on a high that Charlie Sheen would be proud of. For the rest of the day I slipped in and out of some kind of sleep, floating around in a haze of reality. Until now I have ingested about a liter of Vitamin Water, 2 cream crackers, a host of pills, and 5 spoons of chicken soup, it has all stayed down.

Quite recently, similar conditions put me in hospital and since then, I’ve learned that my bowls enjoy rejecting my body. Because of my experiences with gastric flu, I know it helps to be optimistic about the situation. So here I am, stuck with the worlds best weight loss remedy, spreading (if you’ll excuse the pun) love and hugging my toilet.  

I watch the streets of London burn from the safety of my couch and think back on a once profound conversation with a Scottish hippie. Apparently our existence is futile.

It took place on a Saturday afternoon in a local pub after an enjoyable day slowly crumbled. With two beers and shot of obstinacy, Shaun attempted to convince me that humanity is a doomed species. The heaviest statement of all the babble came with a thick sneer of cynicism; “Human beings are born to destroy each other.” Usually I refute anyone who says something like this but without anything valid to speak of, I could only think of encouraging him to leap into Bloemspruit. I decided not to share my imagination with him but did take away the shame knowing that part of what he said was true.

Imagine for a moment a world without crime, without sadness, without fear. Sounds great doesn’t it? Which is exactly why it could never happen. What would we call “good” if nothing dark and evil ever existed for us to compare it to? Humanity floats on this duality; the constant battle between good and evil, dark and light, heaven and hell, yin and yang. The sub-conscious acknowledgement of everything right and desirable in the world seems to over shadow what we would usually snub off as bad. We constantly strive in vain to create some type of utopia, when really we are too afraid to admit how much we need the very evil which we fear. Simply being alive means that you probably live in this ideal, the need to create a meaningful and “good” life.

What’s more baffling is that we unconsciously produce the chaos which motivates our need to build a utopian society. Simply by reading this you probably fall in a tiny percentage of those privileged enough to gain tertiary education. This implies that you will make a step in society that pushes you above those in a 3^rd world, gaining economic advantage, and widening the gap between the rich and poor. By operating in a corporate setting, you form part of the faceless drive for capitalist power. If you breathe you form part of and contribute to the almost seven billion strong human race, which has proven to be the most destructive life form in our world. Unfortunately   our position in the universe floats in a comfort bubble of hypocrisy.

Virtuosity exists in our world but has always rested in the dark shadow of chaos and destruction. Perhaps the hippie was right and this is how we are meant to live; a doomed race which finds beauty and meaning in self-destruction. The glass is half full, drink up. 

Let me just start off by apologizing for making some false promises in my previous post. I was a little over eager to get some interesting video footage but unfortunately it could get mixed up with the media for all the wrong reasons. So no videos…

I can’t say I had the best start to my Wednesday after sitting in N1 traffic for close to two hours (a three lane closure…three lane). This meant I was late for the weekly music selection meeting. I did get there with some time to spare and heard all of the music that will debut this Sunday…yes it does make me feel special.

I can take a guess as to who the two craziest interns at 5FM are: myself and Jessica. I dared her to take a gulp of Tobasco sauce, she did. She dared me to drink more…I did. Now I’m experiencing the aftermath of severe stomach cramps. We spent some time in studio with G and A before learning a bit more about how songs are loaded onto the system and edited for the RCS play-out software. Sot (the man in charge of 5FM’s music) seems to be in a constant state of relaxation, very cool.

Claire, 5FM’s Events Coordinator then gave us the chance to raid the store room to collect a few memento items…within limits of course. I got a few cd’s, t-shirts, stickers, badges and a few post Argus energy gel packs (obscure I know). I will post photos for you to see. This was Claire’s final goodbye to us (for now) as she is off to Durban with the rest of the crew tomorrow, so a big thank you to Claire who made the internship possible (she really was the innovator)!

Pictures to follow.

The only reason why I haven’t fallen asleep yet is because I’m still coming down off a sugar high. Cath Grenfell gave me one of her “whoop cookies”, which can be best described as a pastry made from chocolate and love.

Day 9 at 5FM started out in a meeting with some of the tech savvy minds of the people behind digital concepts. Once again I can’t say too much about this because I signed a consent form with a lot of fine print, so play it safe with a simple ;-).

We also sat down with Leigh Ann Mol, 5FM’s website administrator, and Mel, a social media expert working with the team. Much of what I know about Leigh Ann is that she’s a spiffy newsreader with comedic timing and a great sense of humor, so it was good to see another side of what she does at 5FM. The jokes were there though. Both Mel and Leigh Ann gave us some insight into the stations online platforms and how the two of them go about ensuring they are utilized properly. I would call these two the subliminal engines of 5FM’s operations.

I spent the afternoon helping Cath (from the Fresh Drive). Without revealing too much about who will be played on her show this Saturday, I sat and spotted any swear words in a live recording. Let’s just say I lost count, which means it should be a good show right? I made sure that I did a thorough job not only because I’m a little eager but also because Cath said she would “hunt me down if anything slipped through”.

I will have some interesting video footage of some of the 5FM personalities in about a week’s time…just dropping the hint now.

With only 5 days left of the mentorship program most of the interns have settled in and feel comfortable around the 5FM crew. I can’t help but feel that these 2 weeks just aren’t long enough to fully experience and learn about 5FM (this may be a week extension hint).

Like typical students we jumped at the opportunity to do what nobody else wanted to, clean out 5FM’s storage room. This wasn’t only because of an “eager beaver” Monday inspiration but also because we got to see exactly what merchandise 5FM has. An insane collection of cd’s, dvd’s, t-shirts, stickers, mugs, bags, and even some rare vinyl kept us entertained for about two hours…yes entertained.

We then went down to the studios to learn from 5FM’s crazy couple, Grant and Anele. I ended up asking the most questions (and hopefully not being too annoying) which gave me a lot of insight into how the two make radio work. I think above and beyond what Grant and Anele told us about doing a great radio show, I take away that when you do radio for the right reasons (passion and love for entertainment), all the perks and advantages fall into place on their own. People who love radio will ultimately survive in radio.

So you may have noticed that Day 6 doesn’t exist. Apologies (if it’s any different to you), but I spent this past Saturday enjoying Pretoria central and all it’s festivities.

Sunday was by far one of the more inspirational days of my internship. I decided to pay KB a visit during his show from 14:00 to 17:00. His experience in radio came through with everything he told me. Much of what he learned came from his experiences of working with Mark Gillman, which means he needs to be challenged to bring his crazy energy through the 5FM airwaves. As someone who loves radio I can say it really was inspirational to watch someone work who has that amount of passion for entertainment.

Dino Bravo stopped by with his dance hall mix and cheerful attitude at 16:00. He is about as happy and friendly as he sounds. KB taught me all about Jamaican music and dance hall/reggae culture. I now know the difference between a Deejay, Singjay and Selecta. If you don’t particularly like a certain style of music I suggest you take some time to learn a bit more about it from someone who understands its history, as I did.

I spent the rest of my day in studio with Angela. One thing that I truly appreciate about her is the dedication and focus that she pays to each and every minute of her show. One thing both her and KB told me that stuck in my mind was that anyone who wants to work on radio needs to be honest with them self and the audience. In doing so a presenter can bring an authentic personality to radio…keep that in mind. A Sunday well spent.

Before I say anything let me make it known that I cannot dance…not at all.

This is all I can tell you for now because I wouldn’t want 5FM’s marketing crew boiled up with me before (TV)5 next week…okay I’m really pushing the fine line between secret and “intern going home early”.

(I hope you catching the hints here)

I kept the day short and left the SABC after a brainstorm meeting with Justine, 5FM’s spunky Marketing Manager. The rest of my Friday involved me getting a double dose of Jozi culture:
- I managed to get caught in Rosebank afternoon traffic (it’s bad for someone who’s used to the tranquility of Bloemfontein roads)
- I spent the night experiencing some Fourways nightlife watching Dan Patlansky at Tanz Cafe. The Blues maestro managed to make me look bad (I play a little guitar too) and inspire me at the same time, what a pure artist of raw magic!

Only 5 days left of my 5FM experience. (Sad)5…and so was this ‘catchy’ closing statement.

The day started out with all the interns learning a thing or two about 5FM’s production process. The studio’s that Lybern and Willy (sound engineers) do their magic in is buried somewhere in the SABC radio park, to keep the magic safe? It’s incredible to see how the guys can take some voice talent and mix it up with effects and editing to creating all the jingles and promos that you hear on air. 

We then met with Vukile, 5FM’s Programming Manager, who spoke to us about his responsibilities in contributing to the 5FM brand. I have the most respect for someone in his position. It can’t be easy deciding who goes on (and off) air because whatever decision essentially puts his head on the chopping block, and all departments (as is the case with most radio stations) revolve around what happens in his. Her also has to deal with complaints from the BCCSA, ICASA regulations, tons of administrative work, and hundreds of hopefuls chasing after him with a ‘radio demo’ (this adjusted my focus a bit when it comes to approaching anyone in his position).

The rest of my day left me waiting around the 5FM studios. My chance to shadow Jon Savage’s show had arrived and I was as exited as he was to have Shadowclub in studio. I learnt a lot from Jon but what stood out was that he lives by his own accord to do things differently, including radio. What impressed me the most was his attention to detail and dedication to creating the best content possible for his two hours on the airwaves. A great guy with such a passion for music and radio…inspiring. The guys from Shadowclub were a lot of fun and Jacques (lead singer and guitarist) put on a great studio performance.  

The drive home was long but I floated through it knowing that I had just come out of the 5FM studios having watched one of my favourite radio personalities work. 

Unfortunately another delayed post means I will have to keep this brief…although I suspect it won’t be.

I arrived at the SABC on time on Monday after braving the infamous congestion of the N1 between Johannesburg and Pretoria (I’ve come to learn that the traffic in this side of South Africa isn’t as bad as people have made me believe, sensationalism perhaps). Upon arrival I met up with the rest of the interns in 5FM’s ‘Chill Room’, a nifty recreational area specifically designed for well…chilling.

We first sat in an introductory meeting with Claire (Events Coordinator) and Aisha (Station Manager). Aisha gave us a run down of how 5FM operates more as a brand in youth market than just a radio station. Misha, 5FM’s Sales Manager, also gave us a run down of the station’s sales operations and how it attracts revenue for the SABC.

Tuesday we met Noni, a creative and energetic writer in charge of channeling 5FM’s promotional scripts and ideas. Ambani, the lady in charge of organizing the on-air play list gave us a run down of her responsibilities before we headed off to join the entire operations staff for their weekly meeting. Here we got some insight into how all departments integrate their efforts to create such a powerful lifestyle brand. After some time we sat in on a meeting with the team behind 5FM’s digital media push…if I say more about that I could be disclosing some secrets about the station so let’s leave that at that.

On Wednesday 5FM’s music compiler Sot (please excuse my horrible attempt to spell your name if it’s wrong) took us through the process of play-listing songs for the station. This worked through a team who listened to songs for a while then giving a simple “yes” or “no”. Once again…not much more can legally be said in this regard so I will move on. For about an hour thereafter we got a taste of how it feels to be behind a R24 million RCS system and played around (under stern supervision of course) in ONE of the broadcasting studios…lot of fun.

On a brief note what I have learned from presenters so far:
-DJ Fresh is one of the most efficient and focused radio presenters I have seen in a long time. He still finds time to have fun and interact with the interns.
-Sasha Marteningo has the reputation and experience to back up the theory that being humble and putting the station’s brand first will keep a presenter in the industry.
-Rob Vember has always been someone I look up to in radio and with the advice he gave me I could see why. He believes that in, desperate efforts to get “a foot in the door” at any media house, one should still protect their own brand and ensure it works. He also told me that it’s best to find something about oneself to sell to an audience and hopefully it works, if not “tough sh*t”. (I also should add that when I left studio on the night I was at the back-end of many ‘small town kid’ jokes, all in good fun).
-A big thank you to Catherine for turning around, after I spoke about Dan Patlansky, and asking “do you want tickets to his show on Friday?”, it’s always nice to know someone with a bit of pull in the music scene has done you a favour.

It hasn’t been kept short I know but it’s about as short as I could keep it. Keep checking this page for updates. Thursday’s experiences (which were incredibly crazy fun) will be posted soon.

Despite the groggy, sleepless itch in my eyes and the Armageddon proportioned headache, I feel great. I enjoyed every moment of my apocalyptic festivities last night. After all, the world did end right? Wait…

                            [Cue awkward moment for Family Radio] 

“I woke up this morning.”

You won’t hear about 3 million delusionals saying this with much enthusiasm today. I can’t help but think of how awkward Family Radio supporters must be feeling. Or is ‘embarrassed’ the right word? Well if I had bought into an idea that somehow, without a profound disaster or event, existence as we know it would begin a 5 month journey to it’s own demise, I would begin to question the legitimacy of my great hypnotist Harold Camping. At what point in the 21st Century did certain sections of the human race decide that at a specific date and time they had a righteous passage into a divine afterlife, while the rest of us simply cease to have any consciousness? Why do we continue to tolerate these profound waves of superstition? In an age of intellectual development and global scientific expansion, can we not see further than some humour and ridicule in response to such outlandish egomaniacs? 

We have been wired with a sense of intolerance towards racism, tribalism and sexism, yet a minority group who segregate and platform themselves above 97 percent of the world with nothing more than a belief system, are met with a laugh and slap of mortification. Throughout history the discrimination of faith and the manipulative nature of religious campaigns has given humankind a standpoint for the atrocities of war and persecution. Now a man who claims to have worked out a numerical formula after studying an ancient and manipulated set of manuscripts has indulged in an outright discrimination of anyone who doesn’t buy into a cult’s eccentricities. Persecution? Yes please…

What makes things worse is that many of Camping’s followers gave up their jobs and life savings, in order to prepare for an apocalypse that never happened. Family Radio is a multi-million dollar corporation funded by donations which they continue to take. Wouldn’t Armageddon say “money now has no purpose”? In terms of a business, the global radio network has ensured success by hiding under a mask of religion and swindling millions from their blinded followers, good job! Should I feel sorry for the sheep?  

For now I will enjoy every moment of my post Rapture wait for Armageddon. Waking up to smell the coffee has never been better…but for Family Radio? I don’t know.

Evolution is a term to define only one organism, and that’s the Self. The Self is the universe, the Self is the alpha and omega, God and infinity. And that’s the only thing that evolves because we are all part of the Self. Nothing goes through an evolutionary process alone or without direct benefit to the whole. So when you begin to think that there’s this controlling elite, this controlling hand behind the curtains leading the planet to destruction. When you think the end is near, the apocalypse, Armageddon, and when you think we as a species are doomed. It is not they it is you that brought this about, it is you, and for a very good reason. You are evolving. Stop blaming everyone and everything else. Quit panicking about global tyranny and natural disaster, and pay attention. Because the world is telling you something. It is telling you exactly what is wrong with you and how to fix it.  

- Ben Stewart, Kymatica (2009)

                                                   [Cue sarcasm]

I feel as if I’m living on the edge! As words fall onto this page, the Apocalypse has begun and I feel fantastic! But let me write on and add to the spam of Armageddon theories, jokes, and obscenities.

                                                  [End sarcasm]

Understandably, today will see a lot of traffic around the predictions of Harold Camping. According to the Family Radio broadcaster, the Rapture should be in full swing today. Camping’s followers believe that 200 million Christians will be given passage into a heaven while the rest of the population (97 percent of all people) will remain on Earth till 21 October 2011, the date according to Camping of Armageddon. Camping also believes that those who have not been raptured today, will simply cease to have a conscious existence after 5 months. 

The majority of responses, seemingly light-hearted in nature, to Camping’s eccentricities came from both religious and secular groups and seem to show a universal agreement that Armageddon is always just too close for comfort. Unless some profound event changes perception, both religion and science find comfort in the unpredictability of our  doomsday. Whatever one’s take on Armageddon is, it’s understandable to think we simply cannot exist forever. Do we fear the end of consciousness or are we attracted to the Apocalypse of existence?

A post by LiveScience on the ‘Mother Nature Network’ suggests that doomsday serves as a reassuring concept, solving problems of everyday life. In terms of an “apocalyptic worldview”, according to Lorenzo DiTommaso on the Mother Nature Network, doomsday can serve as a means to an end of world problems which are “too big to solve”.

The universal obsession with Armageddon may simply have arisen from the fear of ourselves. Humans have without question been the most selfish and destructive life forms of the Earth’s existence. I think that in realizing our malicious potential as a race we have subsequently set ourselves up for destruction, on a subconscious and physical level. The problem with the acceptance of our Armageddon lies in the willingness to take responsibility or not. Doomsday theorists have over the years placed our fate in the hands of nature, astronomy, and religion more than the human existence itself. Perhaps we simply fear fatalism. Perhaps we need the belief that we are not in control of our fate. Perhaps we are just born to self destruct.

Now please excuse me while I revel in a few post-apocalyptic festivities. I have a rock show to attend… 

WARNING: This will most likely offend conservatives, American Republicans and Democrats, and anyone with a patriotic following of the U.S., so please read on.

On Monday the 2nd of May 2011, thousands of Americans flocked the streets of New York and headed towards Ground Zero to celebrate the death of Osama bin Laden. The characteristic chants of “USA, USA, USA” could be heard as revelers turned the once placid memorial site into a state of carnival like patriotism. U.S. President Barack Obama announced that bin Laden had been killed by “a navy seal part of a small team designed to minimise collateral damage” in Abbottabad, Pakistan.

In this report by the Daily Telgraph, Hilary Clinton is quoted as saying:

“I want to offer my thoughts and prayers for the thousands of families who lost loved ones in Osama bin Laden’s campaign of terror… I hope that families can find some comfort in the fact that justice has been served.

“Our close cooperation with Pakistan has put unprecedented pressure on Al Qaeda. That cooperation must continue. Our battle to stop Al Qaeda and its syndicate of terror will not stop with the death of Osama bin Laden.”

While the death of bin Laden is welcomed by most, Clinton and millions of ‘anti-terror’ minded patriots seem to avoid the fact that the road to liberate the world from the Al Qaeda’s “syndicate of terror” has been dark, bloody, and not at all heroic. Since the U.S.-led invasion of Iraq in March 2003, it is estimated that over a million Iraqis have lost their lives as a result, greatly overshadowing that of U.S. casualties.

I’m not one to weigh up casualties and barter with the ethics of war, but it’s concerning to think that trigger happy U.S. regime of ‘anti-terror’ campaigns is clouded with a glorification of war. Where does hypocrisy fit into this twisted state of heroism? 

In a 2005 poll, Roper Reports found that 81 percent of American’s felt that “patriotism” was important and that it contributed to their identity as individuals. The study suggested that 9/11 was an important catalyst for an influx of patriotism of U.S. citizens. Let’s not forget that it took  bin Laden 3 years to admit responsibility for the 9/11 attacks, meaning that between 2001 and 2004 the belief of his involvement were based purely on U.S. led accusations.

So what are we celebrating? Liberation from a global threat or false heroism and glory of indoctrination?